I’ve put on more or less 10 kilos and I’m already bursting to the seams. I feel like an oddball in this country of undernourished people. This past year, I’ve been having five heaping full meals a day. A few kilos more and I’ll walk in the streets naked because not one of my clothes will fit me.
Before, I took pride in being slim despite my voracious appetite. Now, I sport flabby arms, a second chin, a three-story belly, and dimples of cellulite in my legs. Don’t get me wrong; I don’t really care how I look. My main concerns are my narrowing choices in clothes and the increased risk in cardiovascular ailments. Why, oh why, did I bloat like this?
I’ll let you in a secret… I eat more when I’m depressed. My frustrations translate to cravings; and I eat and eat until I become relaxed and composed. It has become an outlet of my psychological wreckage. Calorie-laden food is in front of me even as I exorcise my inner anguish while writing this article. Try as I may, I can’t seem to trace how it all started. If I remember it right, nothing much has changed in my eating pattern. I only changed my lifestyle. Maybe my more laidback and sedentary lifestyle now is the culprit?
“What should I do?” is the more pressing question. Some friends advised that I should go on a diet. How? I’m a true-blue glutton to diet. Besides, I find the idea of dieting for vanity’s sake absolutely abhorring. I don’t want to join the cult of those who go on a hunger strike and shun away from the bounties of this earth just to look alluring before the eyes of every drooling male. If ever I’ll go on a diet, it would be because I want to feel good about myself and not because I want to hook every member of the male specie who’ll come my way. Girls, bear in mind that sexiness is relative. There are times when skinny women are sexy and when voluptuousness is the “in” thing. In other cultures, fat is sexy. Whatever you o and however you look, it’s how you carry yourself that matters.
Another option is for me to have an exercise regimen; but I’m too lazy to exercise. Or I can do both dieting and exercising but the prospect doesn’t appeal to me just yet. The desperate option would be to cease eating but I just can’t stop taking in food. I don’t want to die, mind you.
So, I’m still where I began. I’m fat and I don’t know what to do. I’m sure I’m not alone in this predicament. A couple of my friends also have weight problems. In my case, my body mass index is still within the normal range but I feel so heavy and sluggish. I can’t wear my favorite shirts and jeans. And I don’t have the money or resources to upgrade m y wardrobe.
Now I know how my horizontally-challenged friends feel. Profuse sweating follows my every move. By the end of the day, I feel super duper sticky to the max and so lethargic to do anything. And it’s definitely not healthy. I always feel nauseous and exhausted. The gravitational pull is weighing me down.
I was never a stickler for healthy living. My habits are far from wholesome. Now, I am forced to re-examine my lifestyle and maybe introduce a few changes. You see, I don’t have much choice. In the meantime, I won’t let bodily aesthetics bother me. I’m me and you might as well accept that. Besides, they say that beauty is not in the physical aspects of a person. As Christina Aguilera’s song goes, “ I am beautiful, no matter what they say”. On the other hand, I might just opt for an exercise program; it will help especially that my genes are susceptible to hypertension. I’m going to do it for myself and not for anybody else.
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